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Lutheran Aardvark

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16 April 2007
  Lutheran Radicals Release Hostage Brits
Iowahawk Provides Exclusive Coverage

US and British FlagAfter earlier English efforts stalled, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi slipped out of Washington to negotiate with members of a radical extremist Lutheran faction. This group was holding sailors from the destroyer HMS Chamberlain hostage.

While news releases vary as to the legitimacy of the seizure, we know with a high degree of certitude that the sailors and marines had been facing a barbaric conditions during their imprisonment. Video previously released by the captors showed the plucky troops being forced to play pinball and consume pickled eggs and cold Pabst Blue Ribbon.

The report from Iowahawk includes a complete account of the hostage release. It also follows up on post-release British policy changes, pointing out how England will integrate a Midwest Studies module into its national multicultural education program.

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Comments:
"COLD LAGER? FIENDS!" roared the headlines in the Daily Mirror, whose editorial called on the Blair administration to "do everything in its power, sign any agreement, to spare these brave lads from a beer worse than death."


*chortle* Thanks.
 
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